Tick, tick and the Heart goes boom
by Proktes
Summary: 2x18 AU. After Beckett lives, Dunn decides he has to kill again, going after one of the few people who were truly important to her even if she denies it. Castle.
1. Chapter 1

**This is based on a prompt from Castle Fanfic Prompts. Set 2x18. Goes AU halfway. "**After Beckett lives, Dunn decides he has to kill again, going after one of the few people who were truly important to her even if she denies it. Castle."

* * *

She shudders as the cold wind blows through the streets. It's late and Kate is walking alone in the city. She quickly reminds herself why she is there. Right. After everything that has happened she needed time to clear her head. She knows that she shouldn't be here, especially not alone but she just wanted to get away from it all.

She decides it's time to go home. Well, not really home. She doesn't have one anymore. That psycho blew it up. She needs to get back to Castle's loft. She still feels a little surprised that he offered his home. Or that is what she wants to think. Because deep down she knows that he would give anything for those he cares about. And that thought scares her. He _cares_ about her.

She is on her way back when her phone starts ringing. She pulls it out with a sigh. She really doesn't feel like being yelled at by him, even if he has the right to. And she doesn't want to talk to the boys or Shaw either. Then her walk to forget would be meaningless.

It's not them though. In fact it's not anyone she knows. That gets her attention. There aren't a lot of places where they can get her number from. That can only mean thing. It's _him. _

"Beckett" – she answers, still hoping someone just called the wrong number.  
"Hello, Nikki" – when she hears the cold voice, she freezes on the pavement.  
"What do you want?" – She wants to tell him to go to hell, but it might be important what he says. If she needs to listen to this psychopath to save someone's life she will.  
"Oh, you'll find out soon. I just want you to know that you've failed again." – With that he hangs up. She hates how confident he sounded. It sends a shiver down her spine. And she is more than annoyed at the amusement seeping through his voice.

* * *

She rushes back to his loft and enters the apartment. Only when she closes his door she relaxes a little. It's a bit strange that he is not waiting for her, but he might have been too tired to scold her tonight.

She doesn't see sings that anyone else is awake, and she really doesn't want to then up, so she moves quietly to her room. She's not sure when it became _her_ room. She shouldn't think about it like that, really. It's not like she is going to live here for long.

She quickly goes through her evening routine and throws herself into the bed. She rolls around for what seems like hours. Her mind is filled with everything that's happened in the last few days. She tries lulling herself and counting sheep, but sleep seems to evade her. Only after she starts thinking about Castle she feels her mind relax. And just before she falls asleep she hates herself a little for it.

* * *

She wakes up early as usual, her body instantly awake. She still has a lot of time so she takes a long shower and gets ready for the day. Glancing at the clock she decides to make breakfast as a way of apologizing for her irresponsible behavior yesterday.

Soon she is dancing around in the kitchen, after starting the coffee machine. She makes eggs, bacon, waffles, just like her mother used to every Sunday morning. She feels the sadness only for a moment, as if being in the Castles' loft was enough to cheer her up. The thought makes her smile. She feels happy that they are so welcoming towards her, like she was family.

She is lost in her thoughts when she hears the door open. She sees Martha entering and looking around.

"Martha" – she greets her quickly.  
"Kate" – she can tell that Martha is surprised, so she quickly searches for excuses to explain before she misunderstands the situation.  
"I'm here on orders from the FBI" – she says. As always, Martha is calm about her being around them.  
"Darling, I'm hardly the one to judge." – As she had a right to be here, making breakfast.  
"I'm sorry. I wouldn't impose, but my place is…"  
"Ashes. No, I know. – She is interrupted by Martha, who seems well informed about the case.  
"Well, that explains the pat-down by the hunky guy with the earbud. I thought it was Richard making a dramatic statement about me dropping by unannounced." – She smiles at that. It is amazing how open and loving these people are.

"Speaking of, I don't suppose you saw Richard, have you?" – She hears the unsaid meaning behind Martha's words, and almost blushes.  
"No, I haven't seen him since yesterday" – she quickly answers. – "I think he is still sleeping. We are in the middle of a hard case right now. He must be tired."  
"Darling, your apartment got blown up. I know that you're having a tough one. Still, I think it's time for him to wake up." – With that she heads towards his bedroom. – "Richard, darling, wake up! Breakfast is ready" – Martha exclaims as she disappears in his door.

* * *

She has not been gone for a minute when Kate hears footsteps coming down the stairs. She smiles at Alexis, and greets her.  
"Good morning Alexis"  
"Good morning Kate" – you guys came home really late last night. I was going to wait for you but I was tired so I just went to bed." - She is surprised to hear that.  
"I was out alone yesterday. Wasn't your dad home with you?" – She starts to feel a bit worried.  
"No, I thought that you were working on a case. So you don't know where he is?" – Alexis is worried now too.

When Martha exits his room they both stare at her.  
"I can't find Richard, do you know where he went, Alexis?" – She asks, not aware of the scared expression on their faces.

This is when it falls into place. Kate feels her blood run cold as she remembers the phone call from yesterday. That's what he was talking about. She failed. He's got Castle.

"Kate! What happened to him?"  
"Darling, do you know where he is?" – She is brought back to the present as Alexis yells at her. Martha seems calmer, but she can hear the anxiety in her voice. When her phone starts ringing they both stop talking immediately. As she looks up at them she sees their hopeful face and her heart nearly breaks. Because she knows that it won't be Castle calling.

She reaches for her phone with shaking fingers, and picks it up.  
"Hello, Nikki. I think you know what I was talking about now don't you? You're supposed to be dead. And because you are not, I will make you pay for it by killing the one person you care about most. Rook." – She can hear his laugh as he hangs up, but she feels her body and mind go numb. She just stands there with her phone in her hand, as Alexis and Martha stare at her. She can't find the words to explain to them how he is now in the hands of a psychopath all because of her. They will hate her for it surely.

"Katherine. What happened? Tell us." – Martha says in a demanding tone.  
"He-"– she starts but has to struggle to keep herself together. – "He was kidnapped. The guy we've been chasing captured him."

The loft falls in silence. She sees the mix of emotions run across their faces. Shock, worry, and everything else. She is still scared of how they will react, so she is surprised when she sees the anger in them slowly evaporate. All that's left is fear.

She stiffens when Alexis suddenly runs to her and embraces her. This was not what she was expecting. She can feel Alexis sobbing against her, and it breaks her heart.  
"Please get him back" – she hears the silent cry of the girl. – "I need him. We need him. Please."  
"I will. I need him too. - She says the only think she can think of, and she cannot get herself to feel bad about it. – "I will get him back" – she mumbles out.

She needs to talk to Shaw right now.

* * *

**Please let me know your thoughts.**


	2. Chapter 2

His head is throbbing, and he feels dizzy. He opens his eyes slowly, but he can't see anything. It's dark. After a couple of minutes his eyes get used to it and the silhouette of the room slowly appears.

The place is empty, like an abandoned factory or warehouse. Nothing ordinary sticks out, so he redirects his attention back to himself.

He tries to move his hands, but they are tied to the chair, so he stops struggling. He focuses on his breathing and tries to calm his racing heart. Even if he was free he doesn't think that he would be able to get far anyway. His head was hit pretty badly, and he is not feeling well.

Everything is going to be fine. He had been in worse situations before and managed to get out of every one of them. Beckett is surely looking for him now.

_Beckett! _Oh God! If anything happened to her… There's a serial killer looking for her, and it's all his fault. And now he is not even there for her, even if he can't really do much.

Okay. Stop that. These thoughts won't help right now. And if she believes it's not his fault then he should too.

Right now he just needs to get out of as soon as possible. But how did he end up here anyway?  
He desperately searches through his brain to find the last memory he has.

Got it! They were at the precinct, and then….

* * *

**10 hours earlier…**

He hates this case. And he feels so much hatred towards that psycho, that even he is surprised at the strength of the emotion. And maybe the worst of all, he feels helpless, because he can't do anything to get that sadness off her face.

They had already agreed that neither of them are responsible for any of this, but it still hits them pretty hard every time someone dies. And he still can't really get over the fact that she almost _blew up_.

They need to get out of here. It's really late, and they probably won't get anywhere with the case. He just wants to be home with his daughter, and yes, maybe with her too.

He knows it's not really a good thing that she is there, because it only means that she has nowhere else to go, but he might as well make the most if it, right?

He stands up, and heads towards her to tell her that they are going home. Well, he is going home. And she is going with him.

* * *

A couple of minutes later they leave the precinct. It is a quiet night. The wind is just a barely there whisper on their face, and the temperature is pleasant as well.

If it was any other time, he would ask her to walk with him to the closest burger place. Unfortunately it's not one of those nights.

This time a serial killer is on the loose, and he is trying to kill Kate. A shiver runs down his spine and he knows it's not because of the temperature. They should hurry, and try to get off the streets as soon as possible.

He is still slightly surprised that she agreed to leave so quickly. Her apartment blew up, and he thought that she would be a bit more reluctant to spend the night at his place. He thought he would have to threaten her with all kinds of annoying stuff, to finally be able to get her to call it a night.

Well, whatever the reason is, he is just happy that they left. They both need all the rest they can get after these stressful days.

He feels confused, when she stops on the pavement after a couple of steps. What is she doing? Why did she stop?

She turns to him, and for a moment he sees her emotions, before her carefully built mask slides back on. She is tired, sad, and worn out. The emotional stress had been too much.

His first instinct is to embrace her, and hold her tight, but he quickly reminds himself that they are not there yet. So he just goes with his usual approach.

"Kate. Are you okay?" – He sees her face soften at his question.

"Yeah Castle. I'm fine. I-I just need some time right now." – She shrugs, like he would believe that she is fine. He could always see right through her.

"I know you're not fine. But if you don't feel like talking about it, I can understand. Let's go home."

"Castle. I don't have a home! And I just told you that I needed some time. I'm going or a walk." – She had already turned her back and started walking away.

"Kate, you cannot be serious. Come back right now! Please! He is out here somewhere looking for you. Please don't do this" – he feels the anger slowly rise in him. At the same time he is scared, because he knows he can't do anything.

If Kate Beckett decides to do something she will go through with it. He learned that a long time ago beside her.

He tells himself that everything is fine. She just needs a couple minutes, and she will be back. He'll wait for her. Like always.

* * *

He stands there in the middle of the night, waiting for her. He is tired, but he won't go further away. Not when _he _is still after her. So he is stuck here, for who knows how long. And if he has free time, that can only mean one thing. It's time to play some Angry Birds.

He pulls his phone out of his pocket, and gets lost in the game immediately.

He just completed the fifth map in a row, when he hears something behind him. He forgets the game at once, and starts turning around.

Then everything goes black.

* * *

Oh, right. She went for a walk. And then he played on his phone. That is how he managed to take him so easily. Even though he tries, he can't stay mad at her for her actions. He probably would have done the same in her situation.

Really, the only one to blame is himself, for being too caught up in that stupid game to notice the guy coming up behind him.

Well, all he can do now is wait. He knows she will find him. But he can only hope that she will be able to do it in time.

* * *

**Let me know what you think. Also, what is it with me and Castle getting abducted? I feel like my brain is trying to send me a message.. :) Well, we'll see where this goes**


	3. Chapter 3

They are running out of time, and she is desperate to find something that could help. He has been missing for more than 11 hours and they've got nothing.

They looked through the street cam footage they managed to pull up, but they can't find the car. They have no other leads to look into, and she is on the edge of breaking down.

She can hardly breathe when she thinks about what might be happening to him. She can't lose him. Not now, not when she just realized how deeply she cares for him. She is still scared a little of her own feelings, but they will figure it out.

The two of them have to talk when they finally find him. Because she _will_ find him. She is certain about that.

She heads into the break room to make another coffee. She needs the energy because she simply will not stop working until he is safe, and Dunn is taken care of.

She is busy with the machine, when Shaw walks in.

"Beckett" – she looks up at her – "Don't blame yourself, it's not your fault."

"Of course it is! If I hadn't been so stubborn… Why couldn't I just go with him? No, I just _had _to take a walk."

"Stop it! You're not helping him with this. I know how good you are and he needs you to stay sharp right now. So just take a minute to collect yourself and join us when you're ready."

"Thanks, it's just… "– she lets out a sigh, her body deflating. She doesn't know how to finish that sentence without saying too much.

"I know. But don't worry. We'll find him and he is going to be okay."

* * *

Minutes fly by, and she is back, her walls built, mask put into place. They look up when she walks in, but no one comments on her earlier behavior, and she is grateful for that. She really doesn't need more stress. They are looking through the evidence again when her phone rings.

"There's nothing like the bond between partners, is there Nikki? You must really miss him." – She freezes for a second, but almost as quickly composes herself.

"Where is he?"

"Safe, for now"

"If you hurt him, I will…" – she wants him to know that if anything happens to Castle, it won't end well for him, but he cuts her short.

"Well that depends on you doesn't it? This is your story Nikki, not his. He's just an extra. The showdown only works if it's between you and me. Come to the Battery Park ferry terminal at midnight tonight, Nikki. And come alone or he dies."

"How can I be sure he's still alive?"

"I'll send you an email"

* * *

He shifts his weight to his other side again. His muscles are sore, his back feels like it was broken into two, and he is thirsty. His wrists are bleeding, and every twitch hurts. He gave up trying to free his hands hours ago, and now he is just waiting for something to happen, but the helplessness is killing him.

It's still dark, and the clock ticking is the only sound he can hear besides his own breathing.

The door suddenly opens, and his heart stops beating for a moment. The light flickers on, and he has to blink a couple of times, so that his eyes can get used to the new level of brightness.

And then he sees him. Dunn is back.

As he slowly walks around him, examining him, his body stiffens. He doesn't like the amusement that is clearly visible.

"I see you have been busy. Don't worry, your hands won't be a problem for much longer. But I do need to do this, so stay still"

He watches him as he brings two bags into the room, and tries not to panic. When he pulls out what he brought, it seems impossible to stay calm.

He can't help it, his brain races through all the terrible possibilities as Dunn sets up the camera. Because what good can come out of it when a serial killer plans to record his actions.

The relief that washes over him is overwhelming, when he starts the video, and nothing terrible happens.

"Say hi to your friends, Rook."

"Go to hell Dunn."

The earlier easiness is gone, and the guilt that replaces it is smothering. He is taunting Beckett with this, and it's all his fault. He hates that she will feel helpless because he was too stupid to be careful.

"I hope you know that she will find you and put an end to this." – He needs to say this out loud. He needs to convince himself, because he can't, no, he won't think of anything bad that could leave Alexis alone. He has to stay strong for her.

"Oh, I _know _that she will. And I will be ready." – His heart is still, body stiff, lungs deflated. He can't breathe, can't think.

No. This can't be happening. It's a trap, and he has to warn them before something terrible happens.

He steels himself, and starts struggling again. The pain that the ties cause as they cut into is wrists are welcome now, they help him think clearly. He barely catches from the corner of his eye that Dunn moves closer, until he is standing in front of him, duct tape in hand.

"See, now this is just unnecessary. I told you that it won't matter soon anyway. If you are going to cut your wrists, then go right ahead. But I won't be listening to your struggle."

He tries to move his head away, but it only buys him a couple of seconds, and a large slap that makes him stop. His mouth is now forced shut, and the curses he mutters are barely audible.

"Now we just have to wait. And once she is finished, I won't need you anymore."

Dunn steps behind him, and he is late to realize what he is doing, as the sharp pain in his neck appears.

A grey fog slowly descends on his vison, and he is falling into the black in a second.

* * *

When he comes to, he sees Dunn moving around, but he clearly doesn't care about him. He leaves the room shortly after, and as he looks around he sees that while he was out Dunn has taken him someplace else.

He lost count how many times he had tried to free his hands. He is certain that the scars will remain, but he doesn't care. He just needs to get out so he can save her.

* * *

She is pacing back and forth, and she knows that many others are looking at her with an annoyed expression. They can go to hell. Dunn has Castle, and she doesn't even know if he is still alive.

He said that he would send an e-mail, but it's been more than an hour, and she is nervous. How will she explain it to Alexis that her father is gone because she wasn't good enough. She tells herself that she won't have to do that. She will get him back.

A loud ping breaks her train of thought, and she rushes to her computer immediately.

There it is. The e-mail. She doesn't even pick up on the fact that it is titled "To Nikki". All she can think is that she needs to see that he is well.

The video is short, but it's enough to give her strength. He is alive, and he needs her help.

She switches into detective mode, and soon they are analyzing the footage. He finally made a mistake, and left them enough to go on. For the first time in hours, she feels useful again.

They manage to get a location, and in minutes everyone is rushing out to free him and stop this madness once, and for all.

* * *

**review please**


	4. Chapter 4

Something is wrong. She can feel it in her gut that something is off, but she can't put her fingers on it.

It's just too easy. He's never made mistakes before and the first time he does, it leads them to the exact location of where he keeps Castle. It just seems too simple.

So right now, sitting in the van outside the building, she struggles with the clenching feeling inside. They have everything set up. The thermal image they had made showed two people on the fourth floor, and the FBI is already inside waiting for Dunn to leave.

Shaw is sitting beside her, watching her when she thinks she can't see. The air feels heavy, and time seems to move very slowly.

Her thoughts keep circling around the notion of _them _and it's not helping her at all. It's new for her. Yes, they have been working with each other for 2 years now, and they became friends, and she enjoys spending time with him more and more, but still… She hasn't really thought about that they could be more. Well, not much.

She blushes a little when she thinks about when exactly she had him on her mind. She really shouldn't think about those long nights alone right now. Not when he is still in danger.

Shaw mutters something into her radio, and then she is getting ready to leave. This is her last chance.

"I think that this is just wrong."

Shaw turns around with a curious expression.

"What are you talking about?"

"It's just that if Castle was here he would say that this was way too easy. Like princess Leia escaping from the Death Star or something like that." She can't believe she is saying this. "It's just too perfect, like it was with Conrad. The crack on the window, the bridge, and he records it exactly when the train arrives. Like come on, he is not an amateur."

"He is not, but everyone makes mistakes. And now he finally did too."

She almost leaves, but in the last second turns around anyway.

"What would Castle say if he was here?"

She is surprised at the question, but quickly answers.

"He would probably think that Dunn wouldn't be in the building. It is probably a trap, and he is watching from somewhere close. Not from that building, it would be too obvious. Probably from the one on the opposite site."

"And you would believe him."

"Well, he proved it many times that his theories are not always crazy. And this situation is exactly like one where he could just be correct."

She sees Shaw considering it for a moment, but when it is obvious that she made up her mind, she knows that she won't check it.

"It's probably just a theory, nothing more. This was the mistake we were waiting for. I'm going in. You stay here. Don't leave the van under any circumstances. We'll be back soon."

* * *

After watching Shaw enter the building, she has a decision to make. And if she hadn't been around Castle for two years now, she would probably stay and follow orders, but he had changed how she saw these situations, and others in her life as well.

So she hopped out of the van and headed toward the opposite site of the street.

As she entered the building her breathing quickened. The dust hovered around her, and she could hear the buzzing of the still functioning air conditioners. She quickly cleared the first floor, and headed toward the stairs.

She just started to scale the stairs to the third floor when she heard a small noise behind her. In a second she turned around, and her gun was pointed towards the source of the sound. She exhaled loudly when she saw that it was Shaw.

"What are you doing here?" she said it so quietly, that she wondered if Shaw had actually heard it, but she did, or at least figured what she was asking.

"I thought about what you said, and I had a feeling that you wouldn't just leave it alone. And I couldn't let you come in here without backup, now could I?" she offered a small smile.

"Thanks" she allowed herself a small smile. "Let's go, I know that Castle can't stay still for too long."

They climbed the stairs quietly, moving slowly so they could notice any movement that would indicate that someone was here.

She thought she could hear some muffled sounds coming from somewhere to their right. As she turned the corner, she froze and stopped breathing.

In the middle of the room, Castle was struggling, desperately trying to break free from the chair he was tied to.

She felt like she could fly. He was alive. She winced a little when she saw that he was bleeding, but she couldn't focus on that now. She spotted Dunn at the window, while he was observing the building he made the video in. So she was correct, and it was a ruse.

She signaled Shaw, and they moved closer. She would distract Dunn, and Shaw would free Castle. The plan was simple. So she stepped out and set it in motion.

* * *

The last minutes went by in a blur.

Just a couple of minutes ago, he was still struggling, but on the inside he already gave up a little. This was it. He could do nothing to save her, and it's was entirely his fault.

When he heard her speak, he thought that he was just imagining it. Surely it couldn't be real. But soon he realized that she was, in fact here, and she was talking to Dunn.

He was so relieved that he didn't even try to understand what she was telling him. Dunn was too confident, and he left his gun next to him, on a small box.

She had him cornered. It was over. Or at least so he thought.

When Dunn pulled out the detonator, his heart skipped a beat. He was guessing that if she was the only one here, the others could only be in the other building. And as Dunn explained just a moment ago, they were sitting on enough explosives to blow them into nothing.

He was surprised when she had said that no one was there. Did she really see this coming? But if they weren't in danger, then why weren't they here, helping her?

When he could see the fear appear in Dunn's eyes, he didn't know whether to be happy, or scared. They couldn't know how he would react in this situation.

When he saw Dunn slowly approach the gun, he knew there was no chance in hell he would let him get it.

As soon as he stretched his arm for it, Castle kicked it out of his reach. Dunn bolted out, and he could see from the corner of his eye that she ran after him.

Then Shaw appeared, and started untying him. When the ropes were loose enough, he sent her after Beckett immediately. He could get out on his own, but she needed help.

He tore the remaining ropes off of himself, and started running towards where he saw them disappear. He could hear her talking somewhere further, and decided to take a quicker route, so he slipped behind some boxes.

* * *

He was pretty close, when suddenly he could hear the sounds of brawling, and he quickened his pace at once. He could hear a muffled thump, and he stepped out of the small trail he used.

As he took in the scene, his expression turned to one of sheer horror. She was lying on the ground, and Dunn was pointing a gun at her a couple of steps ahead.

His mind went dead, but his body somehow managed to move. By instinct he threw himself towards Dunn.

The sound of a shot echoed through the warehouse, and his ears, and the world went black.


	5. Chapter 5

Time slows down, and she watches in horror as Castle tackles Dunn, and as the shot reverberates through her, her heart stops beating. She pushes herself up from the ground, running towards them, while pushing out the thoughts that appear in her head, because he still hasn't stood up.

Oh God, please no. No, she can't lose him now. She picks up her gun from the floor, her body in autopilot, puts it in her holster, but all she can think about is him.

They probably hit their head when they fell, right? Yes, and that is why Dunn is unconscious too. She drops down next to Castle, and turns him on his back.

She feels the tears start running down her cheek when she notices the red stain on his shirt. She can't breathe, doesn't want to, just needs to know what happened to him. She tears his shirt open, buttons flying everywhere, the panicky movements rushed.

She almost cries out in joy, when she sees that the bullet only grazed his ribs, the wound small, but bleeding. He is going to be fine. She doesn't notice Shaw standing beside her, only when she puts a hand on her shoulder, comforting, she tears her eyes away from Castle.

"He is going to be alright. It's just a bruise and I already called an ambulance." She only nods, acknowledging, and turns her attention back to him, still holding his hand.

"Hey Castle, it's me. Wake up."

* * *

He can only think of saving her as he flies towards him, and just as he reaches him, he hears the shot. For a second he feels defeated, unable to stop Dunn, not able to save her, but then the sharp pain disturbs him, and he feels his shirt getting soaked with blood.

Grateful and relieved, his thoughts circle around her, and as his head connects with the hard concrete, he blacks out immediately.

"Hey Castle, it's me. Wake up." he feels a gentle touch on his face, and his head is lifted higher. He fights to open his eyes, the tiredness pulling him back into the peaceful dark.

"Castle" He knows this voice, although he can't quite place it. It is soft, careful and beautiful.

"Rick, please." The desperation laced through the words makes him try to open his eyes again. If someone calls for him like that they certainly need him, and he can't let them down. He needs to show Beckett that he is not just playing with them, with her.

He blinks a couple of times, the numbness slowly dissipating, and he is thankful that the room is only dimly lit.

He looks up slowly at the person holding him, and his mouth opens in surprise. When he was floating in the darkness, for a moment he thought that he heard Beckett's voice, but he quickly pushed it aside, convincing himself that she would never cry for him, or sound so broken.

But maybe he was wrong. Maybe she felt the deeper connection too, which slowly grew stronger between them. And he thought he felt something more for her, more than friendship, and it hit him like a brick now, that feeling multiplied, so obvious.

Not even caring about the pulsating pain in his chest, he reaches for her face.

"Shhh. It's okay Kate." his hand wiping the tears away. "It's okay, I'm fine."

"No, you're not. You got shot, and you almost died, and it's all my fault." She is sobbing now, the tears falling uncontrollably. "He got you because I was stupid, and I would have never forgiven myself if something happened to you."

His heart nearly breaks when he takes in her face, cheeks puffed and red, tears still streaming down. Like always, the strong urge to comfort her overwhelming him.

"Listen to me Kate" his voice is strong, even though he can feel his power draining from his body, but still it is enough to snap her out of it. "It's not your fault. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't even be alive now, and Dunn would have gotten away."

"No, I should have listened to you Castle, and then none of this would have happened. I understand if you want to stop shadowing me. I constantly put you in danger with my careless decisions and mistakes."

He doesn't know to laugh or get angry as he watches her in disbelief. Does she really think that this is still about the books? He thought he showed her that he was her partner, her friend. And recently, without even noticing, he started to feel more.

This case has made him finally realize how much he actually cared for her. He shared his home with her, paid a hundred-thousand dollars without a second thought, just to get to her mom's killer, and she still thinks it's just a game for him?

"How can you even say that?" Even he is surprised at the bitterness straining through his voice, but he has to make her see him for what he is. Her partner. "Why do you think I do this? I thought you knew that it was more than just the books. Besides I knew what I signed up for when I started this, so no need to blame yourself."

Shit. He probably said too much. They always dance around these delicate topics, but he needs her to understand it. He doesn't know what to think of her shocked expression, but her eyes are glowing with something he hasn't seen before.

He opens his mouth to speak, to save their partnership, their friendship, but before he even starts, her mouth crashes into his, desperate and needy, and his mind goes blank. He kisses back, everything forgotten, the world closed out.

* * *

She pulls away when Shaw coughs, blushing, but he can see that she is hiding a smile. Shaw pulls up Dunn, and starts heading towards the exit, but only after turning back and giving Kate a knowing look, which translates into "I was right".

Suddenly he hears the ambulance arrive, and he is surrounded by men. He tries to protest when they pull Kate away from him, but she just gives him a reassuring smile before he is carried outside, put inside an ambulance.

His face brightens when he sees her step inside the vehicle, and her glare stops the man mid-sentence. She is obviously not leaving. His heart flutters, and his eyes are only focused on her while he is treated.

It turns out that his wound is not that bad, and after they examine and bandage him, he is finally allowed to leave.

He has some small things to discuss with the guy, and he sees her giving him an apologetic look before heading over to Montgomery and Shaw.

He steps out of the ambulance, and watches her as she finishes her sentence, looking over her shoulder to him, and he sees Montgomery nod.

He starts walking towards her, meeting her halfway back.

She offers him a sly smile, and a smile splits his face in two when she speaks.

"Come on Castle, let's get you home, and then we have to talk."


	6. Chapter 6

He can't help the small grin that sits on his face as they travel across the city. He has been watching her since they entered the car, and every time she glances at him his smile grows wider. Every time they go over a pothole he is almost sure he will wake up from the jolt, because this is almost too good to be real.

Somewhere in his head he silences the voice that is still screaming at him for almost jumping in front of a shot and because he was _abducted_ by a psycho, and he knows he shouldn't feel this free, this happy, like he is flying above the clouds, but she kissed him. She kissed him, and now she is taking him home and she wants to talk about this, about _them_.

He lifts his hand to his mouth, his fingers slowly trailing the path her lips took not so long ago. For a moment she tries to hide the smile that lights up her face, but it's all in vain as she sees the dreamy expression on his. His eyes are a little clouded and he looks adorable, which makes her want to kiss him again, although she would never admit to that. Well she wouldn't have until recently.

She parks the car next to his apartment and stops the engine. As he is getting out of the car he winces, his face contorted all of a sudden, and he leans on the car to keep himself up.

"Castle, are you okay?" She rushes over to him immediately. He feels his heart beat faster when he looks at her.

The undisguised worry and interest she shows makes him breathe through the pain that shoots through his body, her presence is enough to make it easier to deal with it. He finally manages to keep a straight face, not wanting to worry her any more.

"Castle, what happened?"

"I'm fine, really. It's okay now."

"Castle. You've been shot. You almost jumped in front of a bullet for me. You're obviously not fine. You must have hit your head when he took you."

He is confused for a second at her serious tone, because really, he thought they had talked this through, and she can't be serious with the head trauma but then he notices the smirk on her face.

"Ha ha, very funny Beckett."

The smile fades, and the glint of tease is replaced with hurt in her eyes.

"Back to that, are we?"

He looks at her with a concerned expression, the part of him showing that he rarely lets her see, only when he talks about Alexis she is able to get a glance at the loving, caring man he truly is.

"No Kate, it's just… I... This is so new to me. I don't know what to do. Sometimes I think that I must be dreaming, but then the pain in my side reminds me, and…"

Her mouth is on his again, and this time he doesn't hesitate as he pulls her into him, her body pressed tightly to his, and she gasps at the sudden rush of heat that pulses through her.

She can feel him smirk, but she doesn't care, she is too busy claiming his lips, showing him how serious she is about this, and she feels like she should be scared at the thought, but all she feels is relief and happiness.

He feels her tongue demand access, and he gladly gives in, not realizing the fact that they are still standing outside his building until a loud whistle breaks them apart, both of them blushing, but still clinging to each other.

He is utterly breathless, and she starts laughing, and it is the most wonderful, enticing sound he heard in his whole life. He looks at her astonished, and the laughter slowly calms into a smile.

"You're extraordinary." He doesn't mean to say it out loud, only realizes what he's done when she looks away sheepishly, but he slowly touches her chin and makes her look at him again.

"Kate. I don't know how you can't see yourself as others do, but I will try to make you understand it. And if I had the chance I would throw myself in front of you to save you again, because I meant everything I said."

He thinks he sees something flash in her eyes for a moment, but then she is pulling away, tugging on his hand to follow her.

"Let's continue this inside." His whole face lights up at her words, and he speeds up, almost pulling her after him.

* * *

She stands close to him while they ride the elevator to his floor, almost if she is scared that once she lets go of him everything will go back to normal. His hand is warm against hers, and it affects her more than she thought, as she feels herself relax after the hectic day they leave behind them.

The smile is glued on their face as they walk to his door, and he grins at the disappointed sound she makes when he pulls his hand away to search for his keys.

As soon as he opens the door he sees a blur of red and then the air is knocked out of his lungs as Alexis hugs him, and he hisses as the pain comes back again. She jumps back immediately, and the deep regret combined with the tears and red eyes make his heart shrink.

He phoned as soon as he could, told her that he has been injured, but he was fine. The new situation with Kate forced it out of his mind for a bit, and as he looks at his little girl he feels terrible for it.

"Come here pumpkin." He reaches out to her, pulling her back slowly.

She sobs against his chest, the tears now streaming down her face uncontrollably.

"Don't ever do that again, okay? I was so scared. I don't know what I would do without you."

"I'm right here. It's going to be okay now."

Through her tears she notices Kate standing in the doorway uncomfortably, rocking from one leg to the other, seemingly unsure of what to do. She meets her eyes, and Alexis mouths a silent 'Thank you' to her. Kate just nods and gives her a shy smile, but remains in the entrance.

When she untangles herself from him he steps back, and turns to Kate. He raises his eyebrows at her when he notices where she is, the question unasked.

She doesn't miss the uncertainty and disappointment in his eyes, and she steps closer. From the corner of her eyes she can see Alexis watching curiously, but she focuses on Castle now.

His smile returns, warming her heart, and he opens his arms, waiting for her to come closer. She closes the distance between them with a couple of steps, and then she is in his embrace again. Her body melts into his, only the adrenaline and tension kept her going the days before, and now as it disappears she feels so, so tired.

She looks up at him, and when their eyes connect the feeling that surges through her is indescribable. his eyes are shining with everything, and more, shining with _love._

A shiver runs up her spine, because she is so lost, and she doesn't now how she could ever think that they wouldn't be together, the connection between them stronger than she ever had wwith anyone else.

Without thinking she connects their lips slowly, like it's their first time, and she pulls him even closer if that is possible. Her hands come up to hold his face, and she runs her fingers over his ear, through his hair. She closes her arms around his neck, playing with the small hairs there.

She feels the heat pooling inside her belly, and it makes her want more, but then she realizes where they are and quickly pulls away.

Alexis is looking at them with a shocked expression, her mouth open, and for a moment she is really scared of how she will react. But then the corner of her lips slowly rise, and the small smile that appears calms her down.

Even if she likes him, he wouldn't do anything about it if his daughter would disapprove, and she is fine with that as long as it doesn't push her away too.

"So, uh, you guys now...?" she doesn't need to finish, and she feels a little sad when he looks to her for reassurance, but she has been the one who always hides, who is uncertain.

But this time, with him, it's different. After almost dying, then losing him she doesn't want to wait anymore. She is tired of the 'what ifs', the distance she keeps with everybody. He showed her enough times how caring and good he is, and this event only made her realize that.

So she smiles at him then nods, and the way his face lights up warms her heart. The awe and adoration he looks at her with only makes her want to kiss him again. Oh, this adorable man-child. He turns to Alexis, who is still waiting for an answer, and nods.

"Yeah, I guess we are."

Alexis's expression softens, and she looks at Kate now, who holds her gaze.

"I'm happy for you guys" Kate feels relieved, but she doesn't miss the warning in Alexis's eyes. She will never forgive her if she hurts him. Good. Because has no intention of doing so.

Alexis goes to him, hugging him again, and he feels lucky to have these amazing women in his life. His mother included.

"I'm so glad you're okay." Alexis whispers, and then pulls away. "I'm really tired though, so I'm going to sleep. Good night!" With that she heads upstairs, but only after pulling Kate in for a hug, which takes her by surprise, but quickly recovers and hugs her back. As she runs up the stairs he looks at her surprised, and she feels the same.

"She likes you" he slowly says, and steps closer. "I can see why that is" Now he is grinning, and she is smiling too, but she cant help it, because she hasn't felt this happy in a long time.

"Come on. It's late. Let's go to bed." She raises her eyebrows, and he shakes his head. "Not like that. Not now. Just sleep."

She reaches out, caresses his face as her expression softens. "I know what you meant. You always know what I need" It's a fact, and he beams at her with that happy smile, because he feels proud of himself that he really does.

They hold hands as they walk towards his bedroom, neither wanting to let go. They quickly get ready for bed, and when they are under the covers she snuggles close to him, buries her head in his side.

She finally did it. She finally overcame her walls with his help, and now she is truly happy. And the only person responsible for that is him. She caresses his face as she feels the tiredness and the emotions pull her down, tempting her into a restful slumber.

"I love you." It's barely a whisper sighed into his skin before her eyes close, and her breathing evens.

She doesn't feel him turning to her, and she also doesn't hear his words.

"I love you too Kate."

* * *

**So I guess this is it, not sure if I should continue, so let me know. It has been a really rough week for me so this chapter was pretty hard to write, and I don't know if it came out alright. Thanks for reading and please review.**


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